2009: Foiled Once Again

Yes, another year has passed and the cactus has once again slipped out of our hands. I cringe to think upon the email I received this morning from the victims of this year's cactus event. As their Special Operations Operator was taking his lunch break, he walked in doors to request a handful of sun-chips. When he returned to his post, he found the no traces of the cactus whatsoever. I dare not say that it is a result of his laziness or lack of thoroughness, but I am led to believe that the Cacti Noel made a trip from our location after damaging our vehicle to pick up the cactus, and then waited patiently for his opportunity. When it arrived, he snatched the cactus and fled, until he can once again victimize another poor soul next year. Apparently the "Special Operations Operator" we had been told about was not so special at operating, after all. Dedicated though he might have been, we recently discovered he was only a family member and fan of the CCIB. We must encourage future victims of the Noel Cacti to hire only competent professionals, if anyone at all. The best course of action is, of course, to keep the sighting details carefully guarded and all investigation efforts channeled though the professionals at the CCIB.

But do not fret. With this bad news also comes a hint as to who the Cacti Noel is/are. While the Special Operations Operator went inside for just a few minutes and the planter of the cactus returned to pick up his cactus, the Special Operations Operator's security camera was rolling! The camera only captured one frame every three seconds, but the following image that the Special Operations Operator kindly shared with us give us a look into who the Cacti Noel truly is.


If you recognize this person or have any identifying leads, please do not hesitate to send a report to legendofthechristmascactus@gmail.com. We would be exceedingly grateful for any cooperation whatsoever.

And so, my fellow cactus hunters, once again I bear the bad news of another defeated year. It will take me a few weeks to get over this crushing defeat, but we will keep on searching throughout the rest of December. Once the new year is here we will be packing up and heading home to Daytona Beach, where we will stay on the alert year-round, analyzing our data from this year, asking tough questions about our failure, honing our skills, and searching for clues during the off-season months as to who this Cacti Noel really is. We'll keep you updated. Until the new decade,

Mister E.